Retroville Idol!
by samuraistar
Summary: (One-shot) Jimmy, Cindy, and I host a parody of Shrek 2's "Far, Far Away" Idol! Usual pairings, funny songs, yada yada yada...R&R, PLEASE!


Yay! My first Jimmy Neutron fic, and my second-ever one-shot! The songs aren't entirely accurate, (the first one, mostly) but this is according to "Far, Far Away Idol." I'll be bashing Betty a little, and Simon (I _hate_ American Idol!) but I hope y'all will enjoy it. Featuring my first appearance! Let's go!

Carl and Libby sat on a table in front of the Far, Far Away stage while Sheen was singing "Livin' La Vida Loca" _way_ off key.

"Give it a rest, Sheen!" Carl said.

"You're giving us a headache!" Libby joked.

"Hey!" Sheen yelled, "Don't make me go Ultra-Boots on you!" He was wearing his new Ultra Boots that were (of course) ten times his size. Jimmy and Cindy appeared.

"Come on, guys!" Jimmy admonished, "let him have some fun!"

"The competition hasn't even started yet," said Cindy.

"Oh, yeah!" Sheen jumped down, "Hey, aren't we supposed to have that guy from 'American Idol' as a guest?" Libby lit up.

"Simon Cowell?" she squealed, then ran to Cindy, "Ooh, girl, is he really coming?"

"Unless we hear otherwise," Jimmy answered for her.

"Which you just have," said a teenage girl. They all turned to the left to see...me! I had my brown hair in a ponytail, tied with a white ribbon. I had a pale pink polyester shirt with white see-through sleeves down to my elbows with the wavy-stitched ends. I also wore a white skirt halfway down my kneecaps, white tights, and white sandals with slightly platform-styled soles/heels.

"Uh," Cindy asked, "Who are you?"

"I'm Angela," said I, "but call me Angie. I'm your substitute guest."

"But," asked Jimmy, "what happened to Simon?"

(Camera cut)

"BLOODY TEENAGERS!" Simon screamed as he was running away from a band of gay pirates.

(Back to us)

"He's indisposed," I said, "Now who's up for a contest!" An announcer (voiced by _my_ idol, Tom Kenny) announced

_"Welcome to Retroville Idol! With our hosts: Jimmy, Cindy, and Angie! First up, Libby Folfax!"_

The heat was on  
it was rising to the top (wah, wah, wah)  
I couldn't get enough!  
So I had to self-destruct  
I heard somebody say  
Burn, baby, burn  
Disco Inferno

"You're on _fire_, Libby!" I said.

"No! Libby!" Cindy said, "You're really on fire!" As Libby ran off screaming, Brobot came on.

_Domo arigato  
Mr. Roboto  
Domo (domo)  
Domo (domo)_

Jimmy repeatedly banged his head on the table.

"Get real, Brobot!" I jeered, "Go back to the moon!"

"Okay!" And he left; then Hugh and Judy came on. Hugh sang as he danced with his wife.

_Sugar  
Oh honey, honey  
You are my candy girl..._

"I gotta tell you, Neutron," Cindy said, "Your parents are sweet together."

"I just _knew_ you'd say that, Cindy," I said. Sheen's turn came up. He walked on in his Ultra Boots.

"I can only _imagine_ what he's singing," I said.

_You keep saying you've got something for me_

("Yep," I said.)

_something that you call love, but confess (skip to chorus)  
These boots are made for walking  
And that's just what they'll do  
One of these days, these boots  
are gonna walk all over you!_

"Hey, that was pretty good!" Jimmy said brightly. Carl came up without his glasses.

_I can see clearly now  
The rain is gone_

"Can he see his own hand in front of his face, Jim?" I asked.

"Nope," he answered fatalistically.

_I can see all obstacles in my way..._

Then he fell down. After someone guided him off, Betty Quinlin came on.

"Ugh!" Cindy said quietly, "Who put _her_ on the list?" She shot a death glare at Jimmy.

"Guys, let's just listen," I admonished the 11-year-olds. Cindy cringed as Betty sang.

_Some boys take a beautiful girl  
and hide her away from the rest of the world  
I want to be the one to walk in the sun  
Oh girls just want to have fun..._

"Yeah! You go..." Jimmy said, looking nervously at Cindy, "...girl?"

"Yeah," she said testily, "Go, girl, and get a serious makeover and some singing lessons." Then Nick came on (with Betty watching him from the curtain.)

_I'm too sexy for my shirt  
too sexy for my shirt  
so sexy it hurts (skip ahead)  
I'm a model  
You know what I mean  
And I shake my little tush on the catwalk_

Jimmy and I had the sarcastic look. Without looking away, I held a remote with a red button across Cindy. Jimmy pushed the button, and Nick fell down a trapdoor, snapping the blonde between us out of her trance.

_I'm...  
hooked on a feeling!_

_"Principal Willoughby!"_ Jimmy and Cindy were dumbfounded. I calmly sat with my feet on the table.

_I'm high on believing  
that you're in love with me..._

Cindy whispered something to Jimmy.

"I couldn't agree more, Cindy," he said, "Hook, line, and stinker." Then Miss Fowl went up.

_(don't know this line)  
(this one, either)  
And I'm hungry like the wolf..._

"Not bad," I said, "eh, guys?" Their chairs were empty; their former occupants retreated to the stage.

"Kids," I rolled my eyes, "_Always_ breaking the rules." Jimmy (in **bold**) and Cindy (in _italics_) sang Shrek and Fiona's duet. (Unison parts are in **_both prints_**.)

**What I like about you**  
_You hold me tight_  
**Oh, tell me I'm the only one**  
_You're gonna come over tonight_  
**_Yeah  
Keep on whispering in my ear  
Tell me all the things that I wanna hear_  
'Cause it's true  
**_That's what I like about you_  
(harmonica solo)

"Overall impression?" I said, "Rather wonderful. What do _you_ think, Libby?" I addressed her in Cindy's chair.

"I say," she said, "it's about time those two did _something_."

"I agree with you there, babe," Sheen said, sitting next to his "chicky-babe." Carl stood next to me.

"Does this mean they won't fight anymore?" he asked hopefully.

"Well, Carl," I said as I removed my feet from their perch, "Down where I live, we haven't gotten any further into your third season than 'Win, Lose, Kaboom' and 'N Men.' I've been reading a lot of stuff online, but I'll have to watch it for sure. We'll just have to see how the season progresses."

"Y'all should be gettin' a whole week's worth of new episodes starting next Monday," Libby told me.

"I know, Libs," I smiled, "But I can't wait!"

This is pretty much where it ended. I declared everyone winners, and we all went over to the Candy Bar for karaoke!

THE

END

Author's Review:  
Okay, so I didn't exactly get the songs right, but it was so much fun to write it! It's a wonder no one thought of this before, but now it has! There's more where this came from if you watch for my next Jimmy Neutron story, "Professor Prom!" I'm not done with it yet, and I'm still working on "Avatar," but I'll have it up eventually! See y'all!

-samuraistar


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